Turning the Page
I have news! (It's also my excuse for not having posted in so long.) I am in the throes of an international move. There has been, and still is, a lot of warfare over this move. Why? Find out in the next thrilling paragraphs!
While visiting family in Georgia back in 2019, Mom & I took a road trip to Mobile, Alabama to hear Audrey Mack speak. (She was awesome.) Heading back east to my hometown the next day, we passed through Pensacola, Florida, crossed the Escambia Bay bridge, and took the next exit, Avalon Boulevard to Milton, to pop in on a cousin I hadn't seen in years.
Then I ran into a brick wall, and it has changed the course of my life. Not a literal brick wall, thank goodness, but the feeling that hit me was so strong that if I'd seen a real estate office, I would have had to stop there. In the natural, there was no attraction -- no beautiful house I just "had to have," no landscape that made me feel at home or inspired me. But the draw was the most powerful sense of attraction I'd ever felt. It was the Holy Spirit, and I knew it. Lord, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? I just got all my belongings up to British Columbia! (Was that a chuckle I heard?)
A year or so later...
"There's a sharp curve ahead, and you can turn that way or keep going straight on the track you're on. God says it's your decision, that He will bless you either way. But if you turn onto the new track, I see it making sharp turns, going up, down, twisting around, plunging underwater..."
I love getting a word from God, but this one wasn't my favorite. I didn't want to have to make any decisions. I wanted God to just set me on the path He wanted me on and help me walk it. He knows what is best for me. He doesn't need my input. I said so. "No, He says it's up to you. What do YOU want?" I doubted I wanted the rollercoaster ride. But since this was probably about my writing career, maybe it would be a good thing.
Months went by. Covid restrictions in BC (the province of Canada I lived in) tightened and grew more and more nonsensical until I felt I was suffocating. At that point, the feeling wasn't really justified, meaning that the restrictions weren't personally affecting me to a great degree -- but the feeling of being trapped was strong. I wasn't able to go home to the South for a visit nor was my family going to be heading north any time soon, but the feeling was about more than that. It didn't even help that I'd received another word from God that He was opening a window of opportunity for me to go home. The feeling of being trapped remained.
Then I remembered -- that feeling I'd experienced in Florida...the prophecy I'd assumed had to do with my book-writing...the puzzle started to come together in my mind. NO WAY! It couldn't be.
I sat with that idea for a few days -- the idea that the proposition God was setting before me was whether or not to move to Florida. It just couldn't be. He's the one that brought me to Gabriola. What in the world would He send me to Florida for? If He's sending me to the South, why not home to my family? That would make sense. Or why not to where I last lived, where I have lots of friends from our church there? This can't be right.
Finally, I gave up and went to the computer. I pulled up 'Homes for sale Milton, FL'. The feeling of being trapped vanished. It was gone in that instant and never returned.
The move may have been my decision, but once I formed the thought that I'd do whatever He wanted, and the timing was right, God made it pretty clear it's what He wanted me to do. There were confirmations galore, and words of encouragement that the ministry awaiting me would bless others and that the move would somehow benefit my son, who would remain in Canada, too.
With a lot of help, I updated the facade of my home with a modified design for selling not staying, tore through every box in my bursting-at-the-seams attic and my storage unit, too, sold and gave away a third of my library, arranged to sell my cars, listed and sold the house, found an international moving company. Life, of course, was happening at the same time, making the process quite an ordeal -- obstacles at every turn, warfare.
And it is still a battle, though the enemy knows he's lost and is just trying to get in some parting shots. The house-hunting has been full of questions and quicksand and prayer for guidance. But I'm here, in the South. So he lost. Now I will wait patiently for the house God designed for me and is making available, along with revelation of the purpose for which I am here. Yes, I moved without knowing why I am moving. It doesn't matter. God said go and so I went. I'll find out when I need to know.
So many people have said things to me like, "That was two years ago when you had that feeling. Maybe God changed His mind. Maybe that's not where you're supposed to go now." That cracks me up. God doesn't change His mind. He's not fickle, He doesn't suffer from indecision. When He speaks, it's revelatory, it's creative, and it's forever. You can mess up His best plan for you and so He resorts to plan B for your benefit, but plan A is always His best route for you.
That does not always mean, though, that it's to be acted on immediately. Consider scriptural prophecies. Jesus was foretold from Genesis. Four thousand years later, "And suddenly" angels appeared saying, "Unto you a child is born...glory to God in the highest! And on earth, peace toward men." There are lots of "suddenlies" in the Bible. So in 2019 He drew me to Milton, FL, and in 2021, suddenly, I moved. God never changes His mind. Remember that when you're reading the Bible!
Check out last year's holiday season posts for some great Christmas-y thoughts and facts, and Merry Christmas to all.
YSIC,
Kemala
